newspaper

mum disappeared.. so did my aunty and my uncle and my cousin and his wife...:|
anyways lol last night i stayed outside my room for too long decreasing my internet time. but when i finally got on and started talk to gabe it died:| actually it wasnt very funny but... we must have a little humour in everything we do otherwise life wouldnt be fun. my uncle turned it off the mystery of he lost internet has been discovered.

there is one hard question that all people who have moved from one country to another avoid, because it reveals too much and theres not much u can do about it if ur answer is the "wrong" one. but that is the question that has been replaying in my head over and over again all night, but i dont noe which ones my answer. most people chose to be kinda like i dunno and dont care but deep down they noe, i think i noe deep down where my answer lies its just that revealing it wont make a difference in life it will just cause more thoughts and the considered "impossible". but yea thats where my trail of thoughts have led to.
i think my craziness has died down a lot since yr 10 and yr 11 but thats another story altogether. (needs a  crazy day)

well im packed theres 2 full days to go and hopefully no jet lag when i get back
im kinda used to the morning and night showers.... apart from the fact i havent done my hair yet.. which i will in a sec not really but near the end of this blog. my hair has grown i think cause it looks not as cool or maybe tats because ive stopped using my hair product cause its all packed and ready to FLY
well a review of being overseas i think is in order.

Leaving australia as only a few would noe was a bit of a scare for me because i wasnt sure if i would still have the sme connections with my friends back home... and i was terrified that i was actually leaving. but when the time came to go on an aeroplane, to actually leave the country i was excited i guess. i really had a good time with my bro and mum on the journey. it was sort of like an adventure and im quite fond of random trips. but anyways its started of well, cold but well. i will never forget coming off the warm plane into the cold passage way in shorts and a tee. i was kinda really excited to see my dad to cause he had been gone for a month and well u noe i guess its semi natural to miss someone u see every day after a month of their absence. but reaching our house. everything look different but familiar at the same time. but as soon as i landed and i got my sim card i txted one of my friends and we just txt talked normally like u noe how i would with dan or anyone, if i had enough money to. but yea i met up with one of my friends the next day my bestie harps. that you could say was one AWKWARD meeting. things do change a lot after 7 years. her accent was so strong i was sooo shocked. i shouldnt have been but i was. but she looked the sme just as abnormally skinny as i left her. that was the first time i felt abnormally fat. but yea we got her hair cut the place was really cool cause it was before christmas every one working in the place was dressed up in like costumes and stuff but it was really cool. BUT before the haircut we went to surprise my other bestie sahra in her house oliva her sis had grown up and it was just weird, to noe her and she had no idea who i was. her bro adam, lol hes still the sme taller more gangsta but more or less the sme. AWKWARD hugs then the crazy bus ride to richmond and my crazy run after the bus. everyday i learnt something new about the country i thought i once knew so well. but the changes the dangers the differences to the world tat was once my own. but everything became clear the once unknown became a part of my life. and i lived a life of partial snow frost and dead fingers. my aunty and uncle and cousins came. paris, the city of frog legs and love became my idea of a holiday misery.  the whole journey there was crazy no one spoke english and we couldnt speak french. daily problems involved inability to speak french coldness and unwanted maccas. tat was all i had to deal with and all that i was given. the trip home was much more enjoyable. short and to the point. i like mocha. haircut. then i left the country of sub zero temperatures for a land of humidity and heat. the friends were still my friends the fear of distance was not present. the times in the snow the playful childish sense of humour, it was all still there. the only changes seemed like the height. but now ive left i feel like i didnt have enough time to explore and grow deeper with my friends. they did learn enough bout me and i didnt learn enough bout them to secure the 7 years we had apart. malaysia. the jet lag was bad i had soo much time for nothing and internet would only last as long as my computer would. but as the days went on my jet lag decrease and sleeping in became a thing tat took over my life. night markets was considered a must but after a day of hard shopping the bed seem the best thing to go to. but as the lazy days passed and the good food rolled in my life just became a fact of eating and sleeping. but then we moved from Kl to JB. food was still a major part of life but so wat my cousins and the shops. the money spending and my aunty. tea was a part of my daily life, just like a "british" girl i guess but so was the connectivity to my australian friends. university was the stress of the week but no matter what we were always looked after really well. life was good. but CNY was approaching and so my uncle BMW arrived and we set off for KL again. meeting the family was a new and different experience. i was really uncomfortable at first but as time went on, so did my relationship with my cousins grew. now i feel somewhat close to them all and i will never forget pei and her gayness=] but yea all these relationships will only cause more distances as time away increases. all these relationship will only work if there is a way of communication. and i hope that in 4 years time when i visit all these people again the closeness will not change and neither will their attitude. pei will grow older but i hope tat as she does she will still be the cousin that ive met in malaysia and england. she will not be snotty and gay *stares*. lol but yea i will miss them all despite how ive perceived my holiday in the past i have really enjoyed it, it may be considered a tad too long but it wouldnt be the sme if it was shorter, i wouldnt be forced to be friends with my cousins and learn how much cooler they are than i expected. and i would have got to learn more about the world i once knew as home. but the future is still to come the place of living can and will always change...
now wat am i suppose to do:S?

hearts, li-ming