30/08/11

My consumption for yesterday, the date of 30/08/11 consumed of

- two teas
- one extra yummy yogurt
- a large tub (yes a tub) of cous cous
- fish and chips
- WATER!!!!!!

Exercise..... Non existent

hearts, li-ming

sometimes i just put my foot in it.....

i feel soo crummy lol...
i really need to think before i speak, and learn to stop while im ahead..... kinda like driving?
feeling stupid...
"Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you." (Matthew 7:1, 2 NIV)


Bring on the awkward silence....!!!

hearts, li-ming

29/08/11

today I HAVE CONSUMED:
- 2 teas (no sugar)
- an apple
- ham and cheese croissant
- water bottle
- a handful of red rock deli chips
- chicken, potato and broccoli
- yogurt and crackers

EXERCISE IS ZILCH!!!!!!

hearts, li-ming

a promise set in stone

ok as DOUGLAS doesn't believe me.......
WE ARE HAVING A BLOGGGED AGREEMENT....


I Li-Ming PROMISE DOUGLAS, that THIS week (starting from 29th AUGUST up and until the 4th SEPTEMBER 2011) WILL NOT CONSUME ANY OF THE sugary goodness listed in the blog below....
but i may consume endless amounts of boost until i am satisfied  OK REPLACINGGG THISSSSS:
I AM ONLY ALLOWED COPIOUS AMOUNTS OF LOW FAT low sugar boost....
consumable boost products are boxed in red=[

i may not consume juice, cordial if given ice cream (namely ben and jerrys) I SHALL REJECT
i will not be lead in to temptation by people possessing sugary goodness
NO ENERGY DRINKS
any sugar consumption should be informed directly to douglas
any possession of sugar can be given to douglas for him to swell!!
doug is not allowed to buy me any forms of "illegal" sugary goodness

im allowed MOCHAAAAAAA!!! no sugar=] YESSS... WIN

according to doug i must walk for at least an hour this week

this is the agreement....

hearts, li-ming

1:44 am on a monday

bonsoir!!

i think blogging has started to become a bit more of a chore than any kind of fun, but i shall solider on without my glasses and in the dark to rant about stuff that not many people will care about.

well today i must say was a highly productive day, i did one hour of driving, bringing my hours to 91, and as calculated by me, if i keep driving at 2 hours a week ill be getting my Ps by December (adding an extra 10 hours just encase..) im actually really excited, like there is no real need for me to get my Ps, cause there isnt a car to drive but the idea that ive come sooo far after just a long drag of driving, makes me feel oh sooo slightly accomplished...

as well on this productive day, i consumed highly fat building amounts of chocolate. but i just couldn't help myself it was just so addictive, especially when your mums like EAT THEM lets get rid of the chocolate contents of this house, so inside your like OK but DEEEP WITHIN your like fatty STOP!!! but this week im going on a sugar BANNNNNNNN just for i think my body to regather itself and re establish a blood sugar base line. I think i should state the guidelines of this ban before i contradict myself....

ALLOWED:

BOOST

CREPES without yummmmmmmmmmmmminesssss offfffff nuteellllaaaa =[

NOT ALLOWED:

CHOCOLATE

LOLLIES

SUGARRRRRRRR

NUTELLA

ICE CREAM

SWEET YUMMY PIES

CAKES

MACARONSSSS

COOKIES

anything that makes me high.... i think thats a good standard...

dont worry ill be able to do it.. SHEER WILL POWER OF A MANNN HERE I COME!!!!!!!

i like songs today though i "found" ( i always had it) this song about DENTAL CARE soooo RANDOM i am so playing it at my clinic when i become a dentist. ALSO i realised that I NEED to start gaining some muscles to DEFEAT teeth and AIM FOR HARD CORE EXTRACTIONSSSSS

i think i'd be a crazy dentist... especially cause i can talk heaps, and my biggest annoyance is how mych my orthodontist talks to me when im in the chair.... I'LL be just like him but minus the dancing.

also today i CLEANED MY ROOM like a mega thorough CLEANING. like i mopped my floor and CHANGED my bed covers.... i DUSTED EVERYTHING 

hovered twice and put all the bits and bobs away!!!! soooo abnormally clean.

but it wont last long.

i also FINISHED A PRACTICAL report like THE WHOLE THING!!! i was sooo amazed with myself i smiled (well considering i just finished im SMILING) and unlike VCE i even managed to play music... im such a rubbish musician but i wanna buy like music books and maybe teach myself a few songs.... problem is i need a piano to help be regaining my tuning abilities... my fingers are so gay they just cannot stay in tune.

mmmm i think that was all i did on my mega productive day, but i was feeling a bit artsy before so here are 2 pictures.. then a rant

STARSSS

belonging cannot be bought or given, its a feeling that people surrounding you influences you in. sometimes you can feel like you belong but other times you can feel like a bystander, trying to get a word in but it just seems like no ones interested in what you have to say anymore. can make you feel a bit lonely. then you re evaluate yourself and your thought to why and how did this "exclusion" begin, maybe its something you said or did or maybe its just an unlikable personalty? or you feel intimidated by the crowd that surrounds, so you spend your time just outside, wondering if its worth the trip back, just to experience this intimidation again. maybe its not you but the people? is there a line where knowing stuff beyond this point effects how you see someone? mmmm maybe thats whats happened... you've started to be yourself and show your "true colours" but arent they beautiful like a rainbow???

I DONT KNOW=]

but i do know its bed time

hearts, li-ming

just another tedious day

at least today i had a good 3 hour rest in bed just watching aimless amounts of tv, killing my bandwidth and being merry.
i havent blogged in ages, i guess i could blame my busy life, but technically i just think it is my inability to organise my time wisely. but yeah apart from that, i've just ben so drained, coming home around 10 each day and just studying last minutely. but this week im so glad THAT I HAVE ONE LESS PRAC REPORT WRITE UP!! its so worthy of a celebration...
anyways since this semester has started, i havent really said much about what i'm doing etc. so here goes...
this semester im taking 2 practical components of gay subjects (biochemistry and research), 3rd year anatomy and french. the practicals are kinda easy.. i'm actually hoping for 2 easy h1s but at this rate its like giving up sleep fro marks.... is it really worth it? i dunno but who knows? its the futures problem i just need to set it up ... LIKE A RELAY race thing.. its just my part of the race and i need to give the future me the best chance possible in obtaining the GOAL. so this semester, two of my friends are going on exchange... to canada, which i must say is highly interesting, but i guess thinking about it its so not hitting me, personally it just feels normal, maybe cause i dont really see them. ones already there, and i kinda feel bad cause its a hard transition living by yourself in a french speaking area. but im sure it will be fun and a great experience for each and every one of them.

theres nothing in life to report about, i guess the glam of everything has just been smothered by this thick cloud of university. I CAN'T WAIT TILL THE HOLIDAYS!!! yes i have already started to count ten days and organise event, and think of plausible events.

lately i think ive been more empathic than normal me, i dunno why, but i have been feeling like EMOTION for other people's situation i dunno how it started but its sooo weird, normally im so cold.. lol yeah if you have a problem, its like whatever... i cant help, normally cause i cant. but lately its like WHAT DO I DO??!!!!! and then you feel helpless. so stupid. anyways jealousy... hmm a worthy topic of conversation i think. there are moments in everyones life where they do get jealous, there are just moments in life where you just feel crummy, and even a person with something as small as a cool bag, or  cool item of clothing makes you jealous. but i think what is the worse is feeling jealous over someones intelligence. i know a lot of smart people, im surrounded by them daily, most of them are aiming high, medicine high, and you know out of the 330 students accepted, they are gonna get it, leaving you far behind. but i think you can also be jealous about how accomplish people are, its only been this year where ive been surround by so many accomplished people, and here i am still living off my parents money, trying to make 50 bucks last 2 weeks, but instead im forced to eat away into my savings, the savings that im meant to keep for future life.

but theres always those little joys in life, where everything implodes on itself, like a crumbling building, that finally falls, yes there is residue but now at least you can enjoy the scenery without obstruction.. if only all days could be like that, care free and open. a fresh mind to a fresh day, no continuous pain no reminder of what's currently happening in life. well thats until you have you clean up the mess that building made, but just think about that new building you can create... a 3 story mansion?
=]

hearts, li-ming

we dream so long...

the clouds hung low and thick in the sky, the feeling of entrapment was growing deeper and deeper within, causing a tingling sensation to run frequently along my spine. the comfort came from the glistening sun, who's radiance and power seeped through the clouds, providing a little glow among the sky. it was not night, nor was it day. it was just a time frame that I was stuck in. everyday was a cloudy dilemma, providing a sense of insecurity and a band of confusion. it started off slow and as the chill increased so did its speed. at first it felt like rain, felt as if the clouds had just let go of the heavy weight it had burdened for so long and just released it in to the atmosphere. but slowly as it fell, the scene became clearer. as it fell it started to pave the streets. as it fell a strange emotion, a feeling of curiosity washed over removing the insecurity from within. white specks scattered everywhere, dusting the roads, the housing, everything and anything that was exposed to its touch. the street was quiet. the window was my barrier from the winter wonderland that was to unfold before my eyes. a thin blanket soon covered the world as i knew it, the once harsh exterior now became one fluffy blanket, which continued to increase in size as the seconds passed. raising my hand, i slowly pressed it against the window, my view into the outside world, chills ran through my ghostly white fingertips, shivers ran through my spine as the icy window touched my almost transparent skin. although almost bloodless, heat radiated from my hand, slowly fogging up the glass, blurring the vision into the world outside. eyes closed, i exhale, my body was feeling weak once again, my arm was a toothpick and my hand was a bowling ball, but i was determined. one more breath. my hand was slipping as my arm started to buckle under the weight, but i was determined. hand like a claw, i tried to grab the glass. body still, one more breath. knees buckle, body falling. a handprint still remains.

i think im way out of my league when it comes to uni, but if i try my hardest, everything should work out in the end...

if only dreams came true today=]

is there ever a moment when knowing a person too much can be toxic?... can you ever be too comfortable around a person that rules fly out the window, and what was once awkward seems normal?

but anyways today, after a long tiresome day, i was thinking to myself, and mum kinda influenced this, but its been a while since i was crazy weight conscious, and winter and leggings, said by mum makes me fat cause they expand so ill never know when i gain weight.. but i personally was like im kinda like ok... but to stand the true test of time i decided to put all my dresses on, because i bought most of them ages ago and if they still fit me.. then i must be ok.. LOL MY LOGIC.. but anyways!!! i forgot how many unusedd dressses i own!!! i felt so girly!!! it was mega strange... but yes they still all fit me!!!! but now my bed is a mess that requires immediate attention...

anyways  that was a bit of pointless information....(might need to find somewhere where i can wear a dress?)

but yeah

CADAVERSSSS scare me

hearts, li-ming